Friday, September 16, 2011


Well known credit card company mails an unrequested matched set including an appointment book and scheduler for Year 2012. Very lovely. At the bottom of the lengthy cover letter, costs for publications + shipping and handling fees are stated, to the tune of $54.04, to be automatically charged to account. Books may be returned within 90 days, for credit. The recipient... moi... calls the 800# to arrange a return. After identifying information is relinquished, we take care of business:

Rep: "How may I help you?"
Moi: "Please advise procedure for returning books, as I have no need for them."
Rep: "Can I first interest you in a $25 gift certificate to defray cost of books?"
Moi: "No, thank you, as any expense is too great for something I do not need."
Rep: "Okay. Please return books to box, tape closed, mark as 'Return Requested' and drop in a blue USPS box, outside of any post office." 
Moi: "Excuse me? I need to drop them in a specific  box?"
Husband opining loudly in background: "Why should YOU have to be inconvenienced in any way? You didn't request these."
Rep: "We see that you are an excellent customer. Since you've been inconvenienced, we'd like to offer the package to you, free of charge. You will see a credit in the amount of $54.04 on your card."
Moi: You don't want to know....